yestrday on the telly ther was the bigtim food fella godrun ramsnee on the telly. normlly i don reeally wach him on t v thoug becaus he likes to done things lik oder sum1s fud (even thuog it suonds silly an it prolly gunna be horribl cos its summin lik a steeak mad of apples with a 100% chees on it) an then he eeats it an spits it out an says “MY GRAN CAN COOK BETTR THAN THA YUO SILLY FELLA AN SHE DEEAD AN ALSO A HORSE MADE OF PIG BITS IN A BIN!!””” an then he says to the persun who cookd it that they shud die in a fire an shuld nevr cook ever agiain. but then he throws away all ther food in there fridge and say “why don yuo cook things that i mak yuo dummy?!?!” so then he maks things lik a crab filld with spageti an sum toast an then paints ther restrant a nic color lik ninja blue an lots of peeopl come to eeeat ther cos they want to say thins like “the spagetti was gud an fresh an lik my mothers” on T v.
his new show was diffrnt tho cos this time he went into a jail wher ther are los of no gud nansys from brixton (my frend tol me that its lik hacknee cos all them bad fellas live ther. but i think he wron cos only fellas in cool thins like dungarees an berets live in hacknee). then he took the jail fellas to the kitshen an tol them he gunna make them learn how to cook thins lik bred an cupcaks an sausag rolls an thins then they all lauged an so did us fellas who wer watshin cos godrun look like sum1 drew his face on a bit of papr an then crumbled in his pockt an then playd 40 hours of freerunin an then took out tha picshur an uncrumpld it.
them fellas mad summ nice cakes but godrun stil had to shuot at them cos they wernt gud to him an he is a bigtim food guy an he is also “THE ONLY FELLA WHO GUNNA HELP THESE POOR SUCKRS” who done thins like take chocolats when they not allowd an not puttin enuog money on ther oystr cards. he also had to shuot at tha boss of the jail cos they took 1 guy away from tha kitshen even tho godrun mad gud frends with him becaus they both had the same pogs an both lovd the movie CRADLE 2 THE GRAVE with DMX. that sily jail boss didn realis that godrun was “THA LAST CHANCE THES HORRIBL UGLY WEEAK GUYS” hav to do good thins lik mak bred rocks.
then they took the caks they made an went to anuthr bad londun place calld clapham. it was gud to done it in clapham cos they fuond a old brokn shop (prolly sum of the suckrs in the jail brok it) an put the bred in desks an thins. it also gud becos if they dun it stil in brixton sum fellas prolly wudv stoln the cakes an thins an then no1 wud even get any money. not even godrun an he needs sum money cos i think he gav too much of it taxi drivrs an dancers an thins. los of peeopl cam into get the gud cakes even tho they wer mad by no gud nansys. godrun askd them if the peeopl minded that they were mad by fellas in the jail but they sed no even tho evrything bad suckrs make tasts lik a mix of dirt an bin juic an old milk.
sum of the jail fellas family cam in but they stil had to buy cakes an thins even thog godrun said nic things like “YUO LOOK LIK YUO DADS UNCLE COUZIN” or “WOW GOOD HAIR WAT IS IT MADE OF?” then he went back to tha jail an tol the fellas that they made sum money an that ther familys came in an stuff an that peeopl ate the bred even tho it prolly tasted lik dirt an bins an milks stuff. evry1 was reeeeeeeeeal happy. except the jail fellas cos i don think they reeeally cared. cos they in jail an stuff.
wen the show finishd i ate a bit of porridg with sum jam an then watchd all of CSI on blu ray. i din unnerstand it.
i give godrun ramsnee on the jail -100/3 becus i rele din like it cos godrun is lik a puddl of sick in a dead rats mouth. yuck.