after i wen thru the secret door in the back of the fridge in lilos me an my new friend Drickens wernt even cold at all. i wasnt tha surprised that i wasnt because i dont really feel the weather tha much becaus of my muscles an my collection of beanees, string vests, gilets, doorags, small shorts and fur coats but i was mor surprised tha the small muscly hair fella Drickens (who was my new best frend) wasnt shivering or trying to soil himself to make him warm like my mums dog knuckles.
Drickens – who wasnt in the pocket of my dungarees anymor – look pretty happy so i said “why arent we cold if we just in a fridge?” an he said “because we not in a fridge anymore” and i said “where are we then?” and he laughed an pointed at something just behind my head. i turned around an saw a normal borin old tree tha i couldve easily climb if i wanted to but i jus didnt want to. “thas a boring tree an i could easily climb it Drickens” i said to Drickens an then he said “maybe you should have a closer look Yuggers. Also what is that in your pocket? is that hummus?” an i laughed cos i remember tha back when i was in lilos i got a handful just in case for the bus home.
then i looked closer at the tree an realised tha insteead of pineapples an butternuts an crips it was growin ostrich eggs the size of a mirror balls an i instantl jumped up, done a 180 an then went to get as many eggs as i cud get into my hands. i was so excited that i started rapping the lyrics to “Gravel Hut” wich is a song by my new favourit rapper GrugMubbelz####^^#
i picked up a whol 40 of the eggs an was just abuot to kick a few into the sun jus for fun when Drickens ran over an was crying like a lil baby or something an sayin “Yuggers no you shouldn do tha!” an i said “why not you dweeb?” an he said “jus cos tha tree got so many ostrich eggs it don mean tha you should take them. do you even want to eat tha many ostrich eggs?” an i said “trash my frash, Ash” wich is a line from Gravel Hut.
Then Drickens got scared an said we should go cos of tha eggs tha i took an he started running towards a well tha was as wide as a bus an he jumped in an he said follow me quickly! an i said “okay you dweeb and why don you tell me wher we are anyway?” an he said “WERE IN THE DEEP WEB YUGNIChH! THE DEEP WEB!!”
an i said ive been to the deep web before (cos ive been ONLINE) an then we fell for 40 minuts until it was so dark tha i couldnt see anythin apart from my glow in the dark tattoos.
then we cam to the end of the well an then Drickens said “through here” an we went through a small door an we came out into a toilet in a small basement an i said “wher are we now?” an he said we at the restrant Brun Daddy wich is a noodle place. an i said ok an then we went upstairs wher ther was lots of loud music an lots of people running around for no reason an everyone pretendin to be happy but also angry an some fella came to me an said do you want to eat somethin an i said “no thaks i stil got sum hummus” an then Drickens looked scared an i said “why you scared you small hairy doofus” an he stopped shakin for just a second and looked at me with his scared lame eyes.
then he said “somethin else came through the door from the deep web Yugnich. something dangerous.”
I wasnt scared at all but Drickens didnt look like he had seen the Undertaker on a bad day.
i give Brun Daddy 18/40